CAUTION Ass Whooping inside Costume!!

I know this guy will probably never tell this story, to his grandkids LOL, because being beat up by a group of mascots is not the most macho thing in the world to tell your grandkids or for that matter anyone. I wonder what he did to tick them off, and how is that conversation going to go. When he has to explain all the bumps and bruises to someone. "See what happened was, a group of superhuman alien mascots were backstage at this concert one day, and they caught me off guard and one of them want to of them got in a good punch!" :-) LOL, but check out the video. I'm sorry for the man's's pain, but it just makes me laugh to even want to this I guess he forgot whether it be a funny looking teddy bear goat or what have you there still is a person inside. That may be capable of kicking your ass

James Bond, Likes to Beat up Women

I remember my brother telling me about this interview when it came out in the 80s and even though I like his movies. I must admit, after I saw this. It obviously changed my mind about him, if I see him out in the streets. I’m going to break his damn hip, and then go rent The Rock I was showing my friend. This video clip, and she said. "That’s why him and Wesley Snipes, like those old school passive ass Asian women if they mess with one of us new age ones. They would get a stiletto in their ass" LOL. She cracks me up

Déjà Vu but Only in High Definition

In the 80s artist by the Paul Hardcastle did a song called "19" it was about the Vietnam War. Take a look at the video listen to the words and remember he did this song in the 80s. In remembrance of a war that went on in 1965. I think the only thing that has changed is to watch the footage of the Iraq war. In high definition, and we have the common courtesy to welcome our troops when they come home. Instead of spitting on them

The Origins of the ''F'' Word

Have you used ittoday?.

You Know You're Living in 2007 If...

Its 2007, and it’s got thinking about the future. It seems like just the other day. We were talking about, 1999 that seem like the year that everything was so cutting edge. Fast forward a couple of years and a few of us can leave our home without our cell phone (I know I can’t). Today we communicate through text messaging, instant messaging talking through the computer to a landline and some of the gadgets that are due to come out this year are incredible I remember when I was a child I use to watch the cartoon the Jetson and you would see flying cars. I don’t know if I’ll see one of those in my lifetime. Who knows, maybe I will, but here is a video and some reminders of the future that we live in
YOU KNOW YOU ARE LIVING IN 2006 when...
1. You accidentally enter your password on the microwave.
2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years.
3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of three.
4. You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you.
5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that
they don't have e-mail addresses.
6. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if
anyone is home to help you carry in the groceries.
7. Every commercial on television has a web site at the bottom of the
screen.
8. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn't have the
first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for panic and you
turn around to go back and get it.
10. You get up in the morning and go on line before getting your coffee.
11. You start tilting your head sideways to smile. : )
12. You're reading this and nodding and laughing.
13. Even worse, you know exactly to whom you are going to forward this
message.
14. You are too busy to notice there was no #9 on this list.
15. You actually scrolled back up to check that there wasn't a #9 on this
list.
AND NOW U R LAUGHING at yourself

MEDIUM... I don't think so

This is Patricia Arquette

star of the hit American TV show medium, where she plays a psychic that helps solve murder mysteries the tag line on her website is (she sees things. Others can't) apparently Miss Arquette wants everybody to see these two thing OMG her TV show should be called HUGE. Instead of mediumhttp://www.nbc.com/Medium/

Oh My God! I'm Getting Older Where Did My Life Go?

Ladies and Gentlemen of the class of ’99
If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be
it. The long term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by
scientists whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable
than my own meandering
experience…I will dispense this advice now. Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth; oh nevermind; you will not
understand the power and beauty of your youth until they have faded.
But trust me, in 20 years you’ll look back at photos of yourself and
recall in a way you can’t grasp now how much possibility lay before
you and how fabulous you really looked….You’re not as fat as you
imagine. Don’t worry about the future; or worry, but know that worrying is as
effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing
bubblegum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that
never crossed your worried mind; the kind that blindside you at 4pm
on some idle Tuesday. Do one thing everyday that scares you Sing Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts, don’t put up with
people who are reckless with yours. Floss Don’t waste your time on jealousy; sometimes you’re ahead, sometimes
you’re behind…the race is long, and in the end, it’s only with
yourself. Remember the compliments you receive, forget the insults; if you
succeed in doing this, tell me how. Keep your old love letters, throw away your old bank statements. Stretch Don’t feel guilty if you don’t know what you want to do with your
life…the most interesting people I know didn’t know at 22 what they
wanted to do with their lives, some of the most interesting 40 year
olds I know still don’t. Get plenty of calcium. Be kind to your knees, you’ll miss them when they’re gone. Maybe you’ll marry, maybe you won’t, maybe you’ll have children,maybe
you won’t, maybe you’ll divorce at 40, maybe you’ll dance the funky
chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary…what ever you do, don’t
congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself either – your
choices are half chance, so are everybody else’s. Enjoy your body,
use it every way you can…don’t be afraid of it, or what other people
think of it, it’s the greatest instrument you’ll ever
own.. Dance…even if you have nowhere to do it but in your own living room. Read the directions, even if you don't

follow them. Do NOT read beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly. Get to know your parents, you never know when they’ll be gone for
good. Be nice to your siblings; they are the best link to your past and the
people most likely to stick with you in the future. Understand that friends come and go,but for the precious few you
should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and
lifestyle because the older you get, the more you need the people you
knew when you were young. Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard; live
in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft. Travel. Accept certain inalienable truths, prices will rise, politicians will
philander, you too will get old, and when you do you’ll fantasize
that when you were young prices were reasonable, politicians were
noble and children respected their elders. Respect your elders. Don’t expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund,
maybe you have a wealthy spouse; but you never know when either one
might run out. Don’t mess too much with your hair, or by the time you're 40, it will
look 85. Be careful whose advice you buy, but, be patient with those who
supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia, dispensing it is a way of
fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the
ugly parts and recycling it for more than
it’s worth. But trust me on the sunscreen…

Mid-Term Elections, Sin City

It’s almost Tuesday, and the political race is getting ugly (but don’t they say that every year?) Have never known politics to be a warm and fuzzy feeling that you get that brings a bright smile to your face when you watch them going on. I either read or heard somewhere a long time ago. "There are two things you do not want to see being made hotdogs and politics." And I guess until the age of 31 or so. They never interest me one way or another. Yes, I would look through the USA Today page and see article "Jesse Jackson for president or Al Sharpton struggles to keep his campaign going strong." But it never interest me and my father would sit and watch Meet the Press. I could never understand why what or how he could watch that. But now I understand. I was younger than and I was doing what young people do living a carefree life and he was older, and he was doing what older people do. Being the keeper of my future. He was making sure that in his words. "Those crooked bastards." Did not mess up my future. I find myself doing and saying the same thing.
But I find myself doing it for my nieces and nephews. I know every country hates us every extremeness with the right amount of explosives, and he and his or her mind wants to come to the middle of Times Square or some major metropolis and blow themselves up, to make a point. My voting on Tuesday will not change that someone will always want to do something crazy. But my voting on Tuesday will do this it will tell some of the senators and congressmen/and women that I do not like the job that you are doing. I do not like the fact that we are spending $2 billion a week of fighting a war that was started in my opinion on half-truths. On September the 12th a day after those buildings fell, we needed a bad guy and sheriff George W. Bush mounted up his posse and found one. But sheriff Bush can’t seem to take his blinders off. He is focused and absolute and that would be a wonderful thing for a president. If there were not so many people dying every day. So he can sit in his office hold many press conferences and babbled the words "stay the course." Because the course is getting rockier and rockier, because every time an innocent Iraqi father, mother or family member has to bury one of their dead, because they were caught in the crossfire. I don’t think they think about how great it is over here in America, he or she has just been given a reason to strap on 10 pounds of explosives and make his or her point of why their loved one had to die. And if you’re reading this and thinking anti-American. Nothing could be far from the truth. I support the troops and the men and women in our Armed Forces. War is not fair, but too many people have died and many more will. But I think we have let our town sheriff pick a fight with the wrong locals. At least when Saddam Hussein was there, and they could hate him. But now, they resent us, and they try and succeed in killing each other. We are just merely a casualties of war. We are not fighting it. We are just dying from it

The Power Of the BANANA

After reading this, you'll never look at a banana in the same way again.
Bananas contain three natural sugars - sucrose, fructose and glucose combined with fiber. A banana gives an instant, sustained and substantial boost of energy.
Research has proven that just two bananas provide enough energy for a strenuous 90-minute workout. No wonder the banana is the number one fruit with the world's leading athletes.
But energy isn't the only way a banana can help us keep fit.
It can also help overcome or prevent a substantial number of illnesses and conditions, making it a must to add to our daily diet.
Depression: According to a recent survey undertaken by MIND amongst people suffering from depression, many felt much better after eating a banana. This is because bananas contain tryptophan, a type of protein that the body converts into serotonin, known to make you relax, improve your mood and generally make you feel happier.
PMS: Forget the pills - eat a banana. The vitamin B6 it contains regulates blood glucose levels, which can affect your mood.
Anemia: High in iron, bananas can stimulate the production of hemoglobin in the blood and so helps in cases of anemia.
Blood Pressure: This unique tropical fruit is extremely high in potassium yet low in salt, making it perfect to beat blood pressure. So much so, the US Food and Drug Administration has just allowed the banana industry to make official claims for the fruit's ability to reduce the risk of blood pressure and stroke.
Brain Power: 200 students at a Twickenham (Middlesex) school were helped through their exams this year by eating bananas at breakfast, break, and lunch in a bid to boost their brain power. Research has shown that the potassium-packed fruit can assist learning by making pupils more alert.
Constipation: High in fiber, including bananas in the diet can help restore normal bowel action, helping to overcome the problem without resorting to laxatives.
Hangovers: One of the quickest
ways of curing a hangover is to make a banana milkshake, sweetened with honey. The banana calms the stomach and, with the help of the honey, builds up depleted blood sugar levels, while the milk soothes and re-hydrates your system.
Heartburn: Bananas have a natural antacid effect in the body, so if you suffer from heartburn, try eating a banana for soothing relief.
Morning Sickness: Snacking on bananas between meals helps to keep blood sugar levels up and avoid morning sickness.
Mosquito bites: Before reaching for the insect bite cream, try rubbing the affected area with the inside of a banana skin. Many people find it amazingly successful at reducing swelling and irritation.
Nerves: Bananas are high in B vitamins that help calm the nervous system.
Overweight and at work? Studies at the Institute of Psychology in Austria found pressure at work leads to gorging on comfort food like chocolate and crisps. Looking at 5,000 hospital patients, researchers found the most obese were more likely to be in high-pressure jobs. The report concluded that, to avoid panic-induced food cravings, we need to control our blood sugar levels by snacking on high carbohydrate foods every two hours to keep levels steady.
Ulcers: The banana is used as the dietary food against intestinal disorders because of its soft texture and smoothness. It is the only raw fruit that can be eaten without distress in over-chronicler cases. It also neutralizes over-acidity and reduces irritation by coating the lining of the stomach.
Temperature control: Many other cultures see bananas as a "cooling" fruit that can lower both the physical and emotional temperature of expectant mothers. In Thailand, for example, pregnant women eat bananas to ensure their baby is born with a cool temperature.
Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD): Bananas can help SAD sufferers because they contain the natural mood enhancer tryptophan.
Smoking & Tobacco Use: Bananas can also help people trying to give up smoking. The B6, B12 they contain, as well as the potassiu! m and ma gnesium found in them, help the body recover from the effects of nicotine withdrawal.
Stress: Potassium is a vital mineral, which helps normalize the heartbeat, sends oxygen to the brain and regulates your body's water balance. When we are stressed, our metabolic rate rises, thereby reducing our potassium levels. These can be rebalanced with the help of a high-potassium banana snack.
Strokes: According to research in "The New England Journal of Medicine, 'eating bananas as part of a regular diet can cut the risk of death by strokes by as much as 40%!
Warts: Those keen on natural alternatives swear that if you want to kill off a wart, take a piece of banana skin and place it on the wart, with the yellow side out. Carefully hold the skin in place with a plaster or surgical tape!
So, a banana really is a natural remedy for many ills. When you compare it to an apple, it has four times the protein, twice the carbohydrate, three times the phosphorus, five times the vitamin A and iron, and twice the other vitamins and minerals. It is also rich in potassium and is one of the best value foods around So maybe its time to change that well-known phrase so that we say, "A banana a day keeps the doctor away!"
PS: Bananas must be the reason monkeys are so happy all the time! I will add one here; want a quick shine on our shoes?? Take the INSIDE of the banana skin, and rub directly on the shoe...polish with dry cloth. Amazing fruit.

Sunday Morning Quickies

Quickie #1 One day, a husband came home and was greeted by his wife dressed in a very sexy nightie. "Tie me up," she purred, "and you can do anything you want." So he tied her up and went fishing
Quickie #2 A woman came home, screeching her car into the driveway, and ran into the house. She slammed the door and shouted at the top of her lungs, "Honey, pack your bags. I won the lottery!" The husband said, "Oh my God! What should I pack, beach stuff or mountain stuff?" "Doesn't matter," she said. "Just get out."
Quickie #3 Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right, and the other is a husband.
Quickie #4 A Polish immigrant went to the DMV to apply for a driver's license. First, of course, he had to take an eye sight test. The optician showed him a card with the letters: 'C Z W I X N O S T A C Z.' "Can you read this?" the optician asked. Read it?" the Polish guy replied, "I know the guy."
Quickie #5 Mother Superior called all the nuns together and said to them, "I must tell you all something. We have a case of gonorrhea in the convent." "Thank God," said an elderly nun at the back. "I'm so tired of chardonnay."

Scarface (The Short Version)

If you have ever seen scar face . You know that it’s probably one of Brian de Palma’s best works , as well as Al Pacino . One of the world’s best actors . Here is the plot line (in 1980 Miami A. Determining Cuban immigrant takes over the drug empire while trying to fill his thirst for greed . In the drug cartel) , but you don’t have time for that here is the short version

Be Careful Having Cybersex

Of course we have to worry about hackers identity theft and viruses , but the next time you’re thinking about having cybersex with someone consider this

New Airline (TPA Terror Proof Airline)

WELCOME TO TPA (Terrorist-Proof Airlines) We at TPA, Terrorist-Proof Airlines, are in the flying business ! We can absolutely guarantee no WALK-ON GUNS, KNIVES, BOX CUTTERS, SHOE-BOMBS or other weapons will ever be carried onto OUR FLIGHTS ! Book your next flight with TPA, the safest airline in the industry.
AND, If a Muslim extremist sees a naked woman he is oblidged to commit suicide ! And if you are not happy with our airline service Feel free To use Our special Car rental service Design with you in mind (See video)Happy travels And enjoy your 100 Virgins

Elmo is a Brother?

Well actually , his voice is listen to the whole story , and meet the voice behind the world’s greatest entertainer (on the toddlers circuit . I must admit I’m also a fan) . In this interview on NPR radio Kevin Clash interview

Japanese Fart

A young Japanese girl had been taught all her life that when she married she was to please her husband and never upset him. So the first morning of her honeymoon the young Japanese bride crawled out of bed after making love, stooped down to pick up her husband's clothes and accidentally let out a big fart.She looked up and said: "Aww so sowwy...excuse prease, front hole so happy back hole laugh out loud."

What Does Your Drink Say

Drinks Show Your PersonalityBefore you order a drink in public, you should read this! Seven New York City bartenders were asked if they could nail a woman'spersonality based on what she drinks. Though interviewed separately,theyconcurred on almost all counts. The results:Drink: Beer Personality: Causal, low-maintenance; down to earth.Your Approach: Challenge her to a game of pool.Drink: Blender Drinks Personality: Flaky, whiny, annoying; a pain in the ass.Your Approach: Avoid her, unless you want to be her cabana boy.Drink: Mixed Drinks Personality: Older, more refined, high maintenance, has very pickytaste;knows EXACTLY what she wants.Your Approach: You won't have to approach her. If she's interested,she'llsend YOU a drink..................Drink: Wine (does not include White Zinfandel) Personality: Conservative and classy; sophisticated yet giggles.Your Approach: Tell her you love to travel and spend quiet eveningswithfriends.Drink: White Zinfandel Personality: Easy; thinks she is classy and sophisticated, actually,she hasNO clue.Your Approach: Make her feel smarter than she is...this should be aneasytarget.Drink: Shots Personality: Likes to hang with frat-boy pals and looking to gettotally drunk... and naked.Your Approach: Easiest hit in the joint. You have been blessed. Nothingtodo but wait, however, be careful not to make her mad!Drink: Tequila No explanations required - everyone just KNOWS what happens there.THEN, there is the MALE addendum ---- The deal with guys is, as always, very simple and clear cut:Domestic Beer: He's poor and wants to get laid. ne Imported Beer: He likes good beer and wants to get laid. Wine: He is hoping that the wine will give him a sophisticated image tohelphim get laid. Whiskey: He doesn't give a damn about anything but getting laid. Tequila: He is thinking he has a chance with the toothless waitress. White Zinfandel: He is gay

YouTube - Broadcast Yourself.

YouTube - Broadcast Yourself. Andy Warhol once said , everyone will have 15 minutes of fame . I think that 15 minutes is getting longer this site is very addictive and voyeuristic you get to peek inside of people's homemade videos . it's amazing what people will do when they have a video camera and an audience myself included , :-)

Unusual Anniversary To some?

I think everyone has significant dates in their life, such as birthdays Christmas holidays wedding anniversaries and things of that nature . But today the is a day that has a mixed blessing for me today is the day that I had my accident, putting me in this wheelchair. Some people would look at this date, as a grim reminder of what has happened. That to be quite honest. Maybe it’s my sick sense of humor, but I celebrate it. It was a defining moment in my life. It has made me the man that I am today. And with my family support and my mother’s words of constant encouragement of"God does not make mistakes"I feel as though I have a lot to celebrate first I will take you through the steps of this day literally and metaphorically. I was in Shreveport, Louisiana visiting my brother and his wife. My brother was still in the military stationed at Barksdale Air Force Base. I had been there for a week, and in 1982. There wasn’t much to do in Shreveport, Louisiana there was one strip mall with about seven individual shops inside of it and I had already been there about three times. There was also a movie theater we had been there also has a matter of fact. The last movie that I saw the day before my accident was Firefox with Clint Eastwood. My brother gave me a hard time, because I was a chicken and did not want to see the movie remake of "The Thing". I was a video game head and I love playing video games. I remember my brother, catching me out in the lobby and giving me a hard time, because I was supposed to be inside the movie theater watching the movie (he always found a way to bust me out. When I was doing something wrong). LOL but the next morning I got up a very early I always did, because my brother got up early. So he was inadvertently, wakes’ I up. I remember fooling around with my brothers inexpensive stereo system, which I knew I was probably going to get trouble about: -) but just overall being bored around his apartment, and his ex-wife was not the most entertaining woman. I guess that’s why that’s his ex-wife. Whole another story LOL anyway it was about lunchtime, and I was just eating some fish and chips microwavable dinner when two of my brothers best friends from work came over and wanted me to go swimming at a nearby lake. I was so happy to be going somewhere, but my sister-in-law told me I needed to call. My brother at work to ask his permission I called he was very busy and told me yes. I later found out that he regretted telling me that because he knew I had never been to a lake but he felt as though. I was in good hands with his friends and he felt slightly guilty about me being there and not going anywhere. Just for the record we have had our time to talk as adult men, and now he is 100% OK with it because he sees the way that I’m living my life. Anyway I proceeded to the lake with my brothers friends it was an extremely hot July day. I remember what I was wearing a pair of blue shorts some moccasins and a blue lacrosse club shirt on and under that I had on my Speedo’s which I had just purchased. Because I was a swimmer and diver but only around a pool. I remember going down the winding road that led to the lake. We got out of the car and went to the picnic area to be in the shade. We sat and talked for while joked around, things like that and then one of my brothers friends said"OK let’s make this happen"I remember the sun being so sold very hot as we walked from under the shade of the trees. I remember standing there first taking off my shirt, and then my shorts, and then I stepped out of my moccasins the sand felt so hot I began to run like I would as if I were at a pool to get out of the sand. I remember launching my body into the air, and then a split second later. I felt nothing. I opened my eyes, and I could see my hands, but I could not move them. I was lying in the water face down. I could feel the water go into my mouth. But I could not stand up it seem like an eternity that I stayed there, and finally, one of my brothers friends drag me to the shore. The only thing I could feel was my nose. My lips and my ears. My brother’s friends were crying one of them. On repeating"oh my God Nathaniel is going to kill me"I remember the hot sun. I once felt all over my body but now I can only feel it on my face. I started to cry, because I knew something was wrong. The local lifeguards stabilized my neck with sandbags or leased it felt like sandbags until the EMTs got there they arrived on the scene and I remember a very authoritative but a gentle female paramedic. She asked me"sweetheart are you having any trouble breathing"through the whimpers of my crying I answered her"no I can breathe OK. I just want my mother"she responded with a caress to my face, and told me"we will get your mother, but we need to make sure you are breathing OK. So I’m going to put some oxygen over your face for the ride to the hospital"they loaded me in to the ambulance. This world was foreign to me. I had never been inside of an ambulance before, this smells and sounds were so strange. I remember her yelling to the driver"would you please stop going over bumps. We have a possible spinal cord injury back here"she called to the Air Force Base, to gain access. They told her they did not have a neurologist there. I would have to go to bolster city general hospital. She got back on the radio and told them. I have a possible spinal cord injury incoming"they told her"we are extremely overloaded here. Is there another location, you can transport him to"her response listens ladies? I’m coming into the fucking hospital have a neurologist on hand ASAP!!!"she hung up the radio and intended to me. She did her. I was visibly scared. So she kept on caressing the only place that I could feel my for head and telling me"everything is going to be OK Sweetheart, everything is going to be OK. Just relax your breathing OK. Your vitals are fine. We are about five minutes away from the hospital. You’re going to be OK"when I got to the hospital. There was chaos everywhere. I remember everyone in the emergency room was attending to me I started to get even more scared. I Nurse came over and said"we are going to have to put you in traction. I didn’t know what that was basically, they took a steel apparatus and screwed it into the sides of my head and then hanging about 25 pounds of weight off of the back of the bed keeping my spinal column in alignment. It was excruciating pain despite the pain medication. They had given me the last sides that I saw before. I started to fall asleep from the pain medication were my brother and his wife standing there in the corner of the curtain with tears in his eyes. That’s what I really got scared. I had never seen my brother cry before the next couple of months and also a first-year was the hardest . I again sensation back everywhere except my knees down my mobility improved more than they expected. You may read this and say why are you celebrating, because I got the chance to live another day and each day has been a gift, because I know, because my mother told me"God does not make mistakes. You have a purpose"today I will go out tonight have a good time and celebrate my life, because I could have died. Right there in a lake in Shreveport, Louisiana, but that was not his will. I think my purpose in life is to educate. To make people understand that just because you have a disability. Your life does not cease to exist in my case. It began on July 2, 1982. At 4:45 p.m. I’ve experienced so much in these years. I’ve done things that surprise me, as well as my family. I love the look on people’s faces when they find out I’m in a wheelchair. But I’m moving a complete life filled with everything you do plus a little but more: -) and I won’t sit here and be a hypocrite and say I haven’t had my bad days. But they are few and far between. So,with my brothers confidence in me of always saying"handle your business" and my sisters willingness to live for each day and my nieces and nephew, unconditional love I thankfully embraced my destiny , and look at this world for what it is in my eyes because he gave me the chance to see the world . And for me . It is a wonderful world , because I was left with the chance to be on it . :-)

Because they think I'm Retarded

I was telling her friend about this story today I thought I was share it I have been in a wheelchair for about 24 years now and I'm very comfortable of what I am and who I am and I have a sick sense of humor . when it comes to my disability and dealing with people . I understand that it is sometimes human nature to deal with something you don't understand at arm's length and make assumptions this is where my entertainment begins if you read my blog , you know that I like to travel . this particular time . I was getting a ride from a friend to the airport he was an able-bodied person we rode up to the drop-off section of the airport the skycaps come up . of course , to help you with your luggage . they reluctantly stand there and watch as a transfer it to my chair all the while communicating only with my friend , because he is the one that is able-bodied and they think I'm retarded , because I haven't said anything they assume , because I'm not speaking and their own ignorance that I am incapable of thought . so , my friend puts all of my luggage on the skycaps dollies and as you know they don't let you stay parked or let your car stay unattended" we both knew that" so as I get situated in my chair . I purposely did not say anything and do not make eye contact eye can see out of the corner of my eye's . they have this petrified look on their face , because he is getting in his car and leaving so therefore , that means that they will have to deal with me directlythis is where my fun starts I noticed the disbelief on the two skycaps face as my friends leaves and says "have a nice trip Tucker see you in about two weeks" in my best impression other person with a retardation I pretend like I'm crying and start to say"whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy what am I going to do he said he was going to love me and he would never leave me whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy I don't have any money I'm very hungry and I need to use the bathroom whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy"if you could of seen the horror on their face it was like they were saying to themselves what the fuck , are we going to do with this retarded man they started to panic I let them on for about five minutes and then with a smile on my face am back to my regular self I say to them , where is Gate 5 and could you please help me with my bags as I slipped the both $20 And where can I find the duty-freeShop , because I like to pick up a few things before my flightThe look of relief on those two men's facesWas that of two runaway slaves That had just made it up , North This is why I love travelingAnd meeting new people First of all I love breaking stereotypes I love laughing I really love messing with people:-) And when I travel alone People are forced to deal with me In my wheelchair There's no go-between No spokesperson Just one on one encounters And Once I catch them offguard with Using one of their assumptions against them In a comedic way I tried to show them What is really like I'm just another human being Just like you I just happen to be in a wheelchair:-)

A Message from your Dog

Ten Peeves that Dogs Have About Humans 1. Blaming your farts on me... not funny... not funny at all !!!2. Yelling at me for barking.. I'M A FRIGGIN' DOG, YOU IDIOT!3. Taking me for a walk, then not letting me check stuff out. Exactly whose walk is this anyway?4. Any trick that involves balancing food on my nose... stop it!5. Any haircut that involves bows or ribbons. Now you know why we chew your stuff up when you're not home.6. The sleight of hand, fake fetch throw. You fooled a dog! Whoooo Hoooooooo what a proud moment for the top of the food chain. 7. Taking me to the vet for "the big snip", then acting surprised when I freak out every time we go back!8. Getting upset when I sniff the crotches of your guests. Sorry, but I haven't quite mastered that handshake thing yet.9. Dog sweaters. Hello ??? Haven't you noticed the fur? 10. How you act disgusted when I lick myself. Look, we both know the truth, you're just jealous.Now lay off me on some of these thing's, We both know who's boss here!!! You don't see me picking up your poop do you ???